I'm a hairdresser who writes. Take your tech and shove it.

I've just wasted hundreds of dollars, many hours, months, stress and lots of karma points trying to apply tech blogger savvy to my writing. I have a damned good book to sell, Mafia Hairdresser, and I will do everything it takes to make sure that as many people read it as possible; BUT I am throwing in the towel trying to become a professional blogger to do it. By the way, this is my #TechWeek “tribute,” and my hats-off-to-bloggers, and my shitty apology to my BF & social media friends who said they’d love to help me.
If you know me, I hang around a very cool group of Chicago social media specialists. They have thier own companies, are paid handsomely for thier blogging or Twitter services, and they have all learned how to utilize their posts to drive search engine rankings to thier benefits and connect with other bloggers. It is my understanding that WordPress is now the ultimate blogging application and that it is magic and a must for linking people to your product, profile and services. All my friends use it and they strongly recommended that I use it. It only took me two months to discover that it’s not a website or host and that my website’s builder is not compatible. I had to learn what a MySQL, SEO and figure out File Transfer Protocol (FTP) was and why I needed it. I also learned there is a whole inner-sanctum of WordPress users that remind me of the Dungeons & Dragons clubs of the past: I just don't want to learn how to delve into the different levels--I just want to play!
You’d think that I would have asked my friends for some help after I bought a hosting service from Bluehost to replace my GoDaddy service and couldn’t figure out a new dashboard. But my BF is an IT specialist. Not a website builder, mind you, but he knows a hellava lot more about how to build a website and move a blogging application into it. Well, it turns out, it was the last thing he wanted to do and I tortured the poor man for two months so, by the time I had time to start asking help from friends, I was so brain-fried and frustrated that I got my money back from Bluehost (they were sweet & I'll be back!) and trashed the idea of using the culty Wordpress application and now I dare anyone to console me or tell me that they’d be glad to help me until I cool down. “I will cut you,” may not just be my motto.
I have read Smashwords Marketing Guide and WordPress All In One For Dummies, and countless manuals on how to upload my book for Kindle and iBook formats. I am as savvy as I’m going to get right now and I'm going reject anymore tech related material that comes my way. This Bloggy Blogger Blogspot will have to suffice for a while and now I will blog once a week here. I will still blog weekly for The Local Tourist magazine under my Twitter handle @mafiahairdreser and, hopefully, bloggers will blog about me. It’s enough, right?
So now, my immediate to-do list: I have book 2, The Glow Stick God, to get ready to be available on eBooks, Smashwords.com and MafiaHairdresser.com. That means promotional videos, press, social media and cover design before November. I am also writing book 3, Murder There’s An App For That, about the murder of a good friend and the sometimes dark and funny side of being plugged in all the time being a “social media expert.” Yes, friends, I’m writing about you. But, if you’ve read, Mafia Hairdresser, or the preview to The Glow Stick God on the eBook version, you wouldn’t worry-I'm nothing but a pissy hairdresser & an ex-professional party boy who writes--AND I fictionalize the truth & I don’t like to hurt anyone with my writing except, of course, myself.

Giving some Love to the Social Media Writers.

“A hairdresser who is a writer? That’s crazy!” That’s one of the tag lines I’ve seen written about me and I’ve even used the tag in my own pitch letters to media platforms to net additional comments and publicity for my writing. Additionally, I could use this tag line to add sparkle to articles I might write about many of my friends. All I’d have to do is take out the word, hairdresser, and replace it with “mommy,” or “tea peddler,” “refrigeration specialist,” “real estate agent,” or “environmentalist.”
We’ve all become writers. I believe it’s required of anyone who wants to succeed in business, whether you are an entrepreneur, a stay at home mom who wants to create a non-traditional revenue stream, or an employee who might be in a position to interact with customers via PR or social media.
I’m not going to tell anyone how to write or what to write. Because writing, for me, is mostly an artistic expression, when I have the time. The artistic writing is what I sell and what I would like to get attention for. It’s the “other” writing I want to talk about. It’s the writing and words we put together to get attention to sell our books, candles or TV shows and to “snare” new customers. We have all become writers; we write blogs, comment on each other’s websites and we tweet 140 characters--multiple times a day. Most of us use email and snail-mail to send our own press releases. I’m the only one who can keep up my personal informative & pithy Facebook updates. In this Information Age it’s key to keep the “content” going out “there” to keep our business in the minds of those people whom we are trying to reach and interact with.
This is a love letter to you, my fellow writers. Many times I get tired of blogging or writing press releases. I wasn’t born with a fondness for typing informational fliers to fellow staff members about book-signings or advice on how to be green. I do love to tweet. But it’s hard to keep it all up, isn’t it? Writing may or may not be a talent we possess. It may also not be our passion. Some of my friends are women with families & have a passion for children or tea. Or, like my friend, Mitch, has his own refrigeration repair business and loves specialty beers. And Lynne & Dr. Sarah have inspired passion for environmental issues. All of these people have businesses which encompass their passions and they also have blogs or books, and use Twitter and Facebook, to name a few, to make sure their business or passions makes them a good living. My hats off to all of us--just know that you are not alone.
I wish we could all hang out more, my writer friends and me. I think then that I wouldn’t feel so tired and alone in the writing that I do. For writing is a very lonely thing. We have to shutter out our friends and families, and even our goals and passions to do it. I want to hang out with all of you, have a beer, and tell you that I’m with you. Whenever you write, I’m doing the same thing. I feel glad to do it but it’s tiring and it’s not always my passion and I know I have to do it. I’m just like you and I know we all feel like we are juggling a million plates in the air to make sure our business, our voice, our books!, and all of our writings are heard, seen, and read. A hairdresser who is a writer? Yes. And sometimes I just want to be a hairdresser and sometimes I want to write books and write blogs. And sometimes I just want to know that someone else is out there doing the same thing as I am and that it makes you feel crazy too.
Please comment here if you like. Or you can tweet me up or even buy my book at www.mafiahairdresser.com
My first promo books will be signed and delivered by mid March! Whoo-hoo!
Love ya,
j-d