"You losers are going to hell, just sayin..."

I am always thankful that I have a never ending list of things to write about and, when I’m too tired to necessarily dig deep into a story or blog that I’m interested in, I let my Facebook Friends write a story for me.
This one comes from a co-worker/friend today. On his wall he wrote:

“Just saw a commercial for a Christian dating website, Christianmingle. You losers are going to hell, just sayin...”

2 people liked his post.
One person said, “Haha, Total Losers”
Of which my co-worker responded “Totally”
Another person said, “I already have my one way ticket so, I’m not worried.”
The last post was: “Christianmingle? w..t..F?!?!”

My immediate reaction was one of appall and I was also a little offended by his remark as well. Although I do not identify myself as a Christian, in a organized religion sense, I was christened in the Catholic church and I can understand how there came to be dating services for Christians looking for other Christians to date; just like there are Jewish dating organizations. And, even though I may have a huge difference of opinion where it concerns some Christian organization’s viewpoint on things like civil unions, gay rights, reproductive right etc, I would never slag the whole religion in general or the fact that they date. I think Christian people are pretty nice and I love them as much as my Jewish, Muslim and Buddhist friends. I hope they all get dates.

And then I got to thinking: Didn’t I have my Facebook friend in the Social Media Class that I taught at work? If he was there, why would he write something like that in a public format? Did my friend not know that some of his clients may be upset about such a statement? And, if even one of the salon’s clients had an issue with the statemement, I’m sure that statement would come back to bite him in the leg--if not get a talking to by management. I’m sure it’s not a thing to fire someone over, but I know I taught him that Facebook and anything online is not private. This guy is a sweet guy. And he’s funny, in person. Maybe it was just one of those flippant posts that he just didn’t think about too much? So I wrote him a personal one-to-one FB message. My tone was pretty straightforward.

Saw your post on Christian dating service and you saying they are going to hell. I know for certain that saying that anywhere, especially online, can and will be taken offensively and can be used against you--and, if you actually think about it, is not very smart. I suggest you take it off.

When I saw him make other posts and he didn’t take the offensive post off, I thought, what the heck: Let my friend write my next Social Media Blog.
I will say this one more time: Facebook, Google+, Twitter, Linkin etc. is not you. It is an ongoing public discussion and you get to focus your content to what your “brand” is about. Unless you have a big bank account, a secure job and revenue stream, and you are willing to fight for any controversial statements that you make on these social media platforms, I suggest that you take another look at who’s looking at you.
I’m a writer who tells it like it is. I’ll fight for what I say online & admit when I’m wrong about what I’ve said. I’ll also stand up for anyone who is unnecessarily slagged whether they be Christians, daters, “looser,” or puppies.

“Buy my books, or I’ll cut you!” www.mafiahairdresser.com

If you are anti-Social you will probably poo-poo Social Media

My friends and people I know and don’t know tell me all the time, “I don’t get Foursquare,” or, “I won’t waste my time on Facebook.” And I know there are cavernous voids in many people’s brains about Twitter and LinkIn and more. Unless you are like me and have learned what they are about, people simply don’t know what they don’t know about all of these “social platforms.”
Think of these platforms like walking into a room. If you walk into the Facebook room you are going to “see and hear” the friends whom you have accepted. You will get invitations and see pictures of them riding their bikes along the lake and you can also share whatever you like with them, including what restaurants you’ve been to and the charities that you are associated with. Over time you will know what to expect from each friend and they will get to know what you like presenting to them and if you like responding to their information. Are you are a church person? Do you play online games and like to interact with other gamers?
Twitter is like walking into the conversation room. There is much dialogue and information being furiously passed across the room. And the room for business conversations & connections is LinkIn. But every single platform has one thing in common: they are all social.
It’s not the unknown part of using social media that makes people pause from becoming participants; it’s the social part that intimidates. I’ve given up training my friends in social media because I find that everyone wants to put out information to prospective clients over social media platforms—but they don’t want to receive any input, invitations, requests or information from others. The social media specialists, like me, who have been using Twitter, Foursquare, Yelp, CitySearch etc. know thousands of people and have many connections. Who wouldn’t want to promote their restaurant, church, charity, political thoughts to thousands of people who might support their individual endeavors? The problem is that for you to put out your information into the room or conversation, you have to participate and “speak” as well as listen—people have to learn that you are here to stay and that you or you business has integrity--and you have to be willing to take the conversation offline as soon as possible.
The cardinal rule for any Social Media Specialist is to “take it offline” as soon as possible. Social is the first word and that’s exactly what we must try to do: We meet each other after our initial conversation in that room full of others, and it is offline where we learn how much we have in common and how much we can help each other. And, let me tell you, you will meet your new best friends whom you have the most things in common with. People may meet through a media platform by common interests and the relationships that are gained can nurture a business or a cause. Social Media is just a new way of taping into your community to mingle, prosper, help, create and change the world but it’s still about people. So, it’s really about connecting with people you’ve been trying to attract to you and that sounds personal and professional and very wise to me.
go to www.MafiaHairdresser.com to continue the “conversation.”

Giving some Love to the Social Media Writers.

“A hairdresser who is a writer? That’s crazy!” That’s one of the tag lines I’ve seen written about me and I’ve even used the tag in my own pitch letters to media platforms to net additional comments and publicity for my writing. Additionally, I could use this tag line to add sparkle to articles I might write about many of my friends. All I’d have to do is take out the word, hairdresser, and replace it with “mommy,” or “tea peddler,” “refrigeration specialist,” “real estate agent,” or “environmentalist.”
We’ve all become writers. I believe it’s required of anyone who wants to succeed in business, whether you are an entrepreneur, a stay at home mom who wants to create a non-traditional revenue stream, or an employee who might be in a position to interact with customers via PR or social media.
I’m not going to tell anyone how to write or what to write. Because writing, for me, is mostly an artistic expression, when I have the time. The artistic writing is what I sell and what I would like to get attention for. It’s the “other” writing I want to talk about. It’s the writing and words we put together to get attention to sell our books, candles or TV shows and to “snare” new customers. We have all become writers; we write blogs, comment on each other’s websites and we tweet 140 characters--multiple times a day. Most of us use email and snail-mail to send our own press releases. I’m the only one who can keep up my personal informative & pithy Facebook updates. In this Information Age it’s key to keep the “content” going out “there” to keep our business in the minds of those people whom we are trying to reach and interact with.
This is a love letter to you, my fellow writers. Many times I get tired of blogging or writing press releases. I wasn’t born with a fondness for typing informational fliers to fellow staff members about book-signings or advice on how to be green. I do love to tweet. But it’s hard to keep it all up, isn’t it? Writing may or may not be a talent we possess. It may also not be our passion. Some of my friends are women with families & have a passion for children or tea. Or, like my friend, Mitch, has his own refrigeration repair business and loves specialty beers. And Lynne & Dr. Sarah have inspired passion for environmental issues. All of these people have businesses which encompass their passions and they also have blogs or books, and use Twitter and Facebook, to name a few, to make sure their business or passions makes them a good living. My hats off to all of us--just know that you are not alone.
I wish we could all hang out more, my writer friends and me. I think then that I wouldn’t feel so tired and alone in the writing that I do. For writing is a very lonely thing. We have to shutter out our friends and families, and even our goals and passions to do it. I want to hang out with all of you, have a beer, and tell you that I’m with you. Whenever you write, I’m doing the same thing. I feel glad to do it but it’s tiring and it’s not always my passion and I know I have to do it. I’m just like you and I know we all feel like we are juggling a million plates in the air to make sure our business, our voice, our books!, and all of our writings are heard, seen, and read. A hairdresser who is a writer? Yes. And sometimes I just want to be a hairdresser and sometimes I want to write books and write blogs. And sometimes I just want to know that someone else is out there doing the same thing as I am and that it makes you feel crazy too.
Please comment here if you like. Or you can tweet me up or even buy my book at www.mafiahairdresser.com
My first promo books will be signed and delivered by mid March! Whoo-hoo!
Love ya,
j-d

For the love of blogging.

Oh my goodness,
I have not blogged since November 9th. Where has the time gone? Oh yes, I remember; I moved, I work as a hairdresser, and I'm publishing my first novel in less than a month.
But time, work, and passion are not the only reason that I have not blogged. The other reason was that I didn't really have anything that I wanted to write about. And that is a luxury for any blogger: To write what they want, when they want, and also write only when they are inspired to.
But most of my Social Media friends need to blog regularly and about things that they may not be as excited about as they would like. Blogging has become a gig that must be kept up regularly in hopes that it turns into a paid gig. We gain visitors to our blogs which give hits to web sites which begets followers on Twitter and Facebook. As the analytics could tell anyone who is watching, we can become very powerful tools which can push a restaurant or a product; should we deem the product worthy enough to blog about--or you pay us to write about it.
So, this is for the product companies who don't get it. Social Media is a wonderful tool for you to push your products. You may not understand it yet, but you had better start paying my friends what they are worth. Even I do not charge my Twitter clients full price when I do their haircuts and colors -- sometimes I comp them! These people are doing me a service by telling people if they had a good experience at my salon -- or not! The amount of people who read what my Social Media friends are saying is priceless and I appreciate it.
Social Media might seem like it might be too social and less analytics, but that is the beauty of it. It's social and it's about people, not numbers. But the numbers will follow the people. I'm proof. I only write what I love and my business and writing and Twitter and Facebook numbers have grown. And Yes, I can translate that to better sales than before I started a blog.
I am a lucky one. I do not make money from my blogging. I do not take kick-backs. I only write to make sure my name and brand is out there and I do it by blogging about things I'm passionate about.
Which leads me to tell you about what one of my clients invented: THE TODDY!
It's an environmentally friendly microfiber cloth made for scratch-free cleaning for your Blackberry, iPhone, iPad and any sensitive surface.

It's the perfect gift and I have 5 of them and my friends love them. AND YES, I got them for free! but Todd had no idea I was going to blog about his product. I really do love it and I hope he does well with his company. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST!

[Hey Todd, if your sales go through the roof....yeah, I'll take a few Toddy's...]

Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

I do not Trust Yelp.com

This is a blog about Yelp.com, integrity, and social media. It's also a follow up to the my blog, Fired over Foursquare, ( http://tinyurl.com/28ckzwk ) which I wrote a few weeks ago. DISCLOSURE: I was not: but I am now a disgruntled employee of "Blank," from the aforementioned blog.


In "F over F" I wrote about a business owner who did not understand, because of social media sites and outlets, such as Foursquare, Facebook, MySpace, CitySearch, Metromix and YELP, that clients of their business have the ability to choose to follow a hairdresser or aerobics instructor or waiter to another business location AND the client also has the right to stay and patronize the owners' business. In this day and age, both the business owner and the service personnel have the ability to provide a very personal ongoing rapport and relationship with their clients, and prospective clients, with their social media skills. Because of social media, the client has choice!


As a hairdresser with an Iphone, my clients let me know if they are running late or they can "FaceBook me" with hair or restaurant questions. They can see what I'm up to on the weekends and join me for volleyball. And through Twitter and Facebook I can let them know if we have a new product that I recommend or if we get a new stylist into the salon that I would like them to welcome with me. My website links me and clients to Green sites and my novels and my writing. And my blog is, well, you're reading it...


Since "Blank" did not understand the social netting that supports and sustains his clients enjoyment and continued interaction with his business, it came as no surprise to me that he and I would agree to end our business relationship and we parted ways--on good terms--or so I thought. [By the way, Blank finally got a FaceBook fan page and a website. Both mediums do not solicit interaction from staff or clients.]


Then the letter arrived in my clients mail boxes from Blank Salon. It did not have a welcoming tone such as "We thank you for your business and we'd love to see you again." It simply stated that I was no longer working at his salon. A shitty piece of marketing and a waste of a stamp, I say. I do believe Blank had his feelings hurt because I left, but come on...


Well this letter pissed off quite a few of my clients. First they panicked. (see comments on "F over F") And then they went to any number of social media outlets to find out where I was. And then two of my clients who had previously posted positive comments on YELP went back onto YELP to let Blank know that they did not appreciate the way they were treated.


Another disclosure: It might matter to you and to YELP and to BLANK, but I did not put my clients up to this. BUT I could be a vindictive ex-employee who is also a liar.


SO: Here's where what really pisses me off. "SOMEONE" had those unsolicited YELPs written by my clients removed. And do you know which Yelps were are left on for Blanks business? The positive Yelps that my clients had previously written about me and another ex-employee who also now happened to works with me at a brand new salon! So, basically, as of today, all of his positive ratings are still being generated by Yelps about me and another former employee. As a stylist who's still bringing new clients to Blank's salon via social media shoutouts from my client's past YELP's: I'm appalled. But as a writer of Chicago scandal and social injustice--I love it! Thank you, YELP and Blank.



Shame on the business owner if he was the one who had only the negative Yelps removed. BUT damn you YELP for taking away the voice of real customers. Neither of my clients were contacted by YELP to see if a vindictive hairdresser put them up to a negative posting--so both of them re-posted again--only with a vengeance.

I have always enjoyed a high Yelp rating because my clients are social media users and they can say what they will about me. Thank god, it's been positive--up to now. But also, up until now, I have thought of YELP as an unbiased resource of reviews from real customers of businesses; businesses that I might like to use, such as restaurants, salons etc.

But I do not trust Yelp.com anymore. If a business can keep a positive Yelp ratings simply by removing posts that they do not like, this site has no integrity. Yelp is simply a tool. And maybe a bigger tool than I think Blank is.


I am now going to dedicate a page of my website, http://mafiahairdresser.com/ to making sure that Chicago stylists don't get kicked to the curb by tyrannical salon owners, and that Chicago clients can always find out where their stylist are. More to come...
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

Fired over Foursquare?

Up to now the salon where I have worked for three years has been my financial anchor, and the place where I have chosen to do my clients’ hair. I have blogged about the salon, written pieces for my boss, and I’ve “checked in” on Foursquare to keep the salon name and address in the public eye. I’ve also made mention on Facebook and my website whenever we got a new product in or a new stylist because the salon had no social media presence other than the occasional piece in print. Since the boss had no website I felt I was doing a pretty good job at keeping his name out there. It’s only been recently that he asked me to cease and desist.


The first inkling that I had that my boss had an issue with everything that I had been doing in media for the past three years was when I was a guest artist for “Haircuts for Haiti.” It was an event that I brought up to him and he turned down so I attended with a salon down the street called Joseph Michael’s Salon & Spa. (I had previously worked there for 14 years and left on great terms. I just needed a change.) In fact, I had also helped another happy Joseph Michael’s ex employee dovetail on the Joseph Michael’s event and he did the same event the same day at Chicago Male. I had helped “pool” the publicity, aka, social marketing. This successful event gave a nice glow to the people who worked at Joseph Michael’s and Chicago Male. Two salons and stylists from other salons, coming together to do a good thing: Right? My boss was enraged. He did not like the linking of one of his stylists with another salon in print or internet-wise. Basically, I laughed.


The first cease and desist came when my boss noticed that, when I checked in on Foursquare on FaceBook, the Googlemap would be the address to Bodhi Spiritual Center. Bodhi is where I had been the leader of what is called the Green Ministry. To make matters worse, sometimes my website, MafiaHairdresser.com would show up. Now, I never saw either of these things come up in my FaceBook feed, or anywhere else, but I’m sure they happened. It took the salon manager to figure out that I had innocently put my salon’s work number in all three of my listed jobs as Hairdresser, Writer and Green Leader. So, whenever I checked into Foursuare on Facebook, the Foursquare address and number for the salon merged and matched with Bodhi’s weblink or mine. I guess this is what they call a bug but my boss was bugged off! He accused me of espionage and tinkering with Googlemaps and secret coding and all kinds of other things that he and I don’t understand.


I didn’t laugh that time. In fact I apologized to my boss when we fixed that glitch and I let him know that I would have fired me if I had actually thought an employee actually did what he had accused me of. In retrospect, I think he was afraid that I’d slag him in the social media world.


Social Media is part of what I do to. It helped me walk into a new salon with ½ a clientele, build up a new clientele, and even brought new clients to other stylist; all because of social marketing. It helps me spread the green word, keep in touch with my clients and, soon, it will help me publish my two novels and well as a third of which I am writing now. (Based on social media and a "Grindr" murder in Arizona--?)


The parting of the ways from “Blank” salon came when my boss asked me to remove any mention of his name from my website. Instead, he wanted me to put a link to his new up and coming website. He also asked me never to mention his salon’s name on Twitter or Facebook, nor check into his salon on Foursquare. No phone number to where I worked was to be placed in my job listing on Facebook, but I was allowed to put his website link in. All of this was to position and posture himself as sole administrator and director of his newly trademarked “brand.” Oh yeah, he would not put my link, MafiaHairdresser.com, on his new Facebook fan page nor his up and coming website. He said that he was afraid that people would think that he was in the mafia because his last name was Italian.


Now, I’m all for being the ruler of your own brand. I have my own. I’m Mafia Hairdresser. I have a blogspot and a website and it is the name of my first novel. Anyone who follows me on Twitter or has seen my feeds on FaceBook or has read my blogs know that I’m a hairdresser and a green-guy who writes whatever I talk about to my clients—which is exactly what I’m doing now.


And my brand needs to reach people. Sometimes I want to look like a struggling writer: see my simple blogspot or Go-Daddy website. And sometimes I want people to think that I’m a bigger brand so I will partner with an art Gallery like Curly Tale Fine Art to host an Earth Hour fundraiser for Climate Cycle. These entities allow me to blog and Facebook and Tweet about them. And I know that Curly Tale Fine Art and Earth Hour and Climate Cycle have blogged, Facebooked or Tweeted-up my brand up as well for their own purposes. It’s all good.


But what happens when you work for an employer who may not understand how social media works? I know an aerobics instructor who is not allowed to Tweet, Facebook, or blog about his work and he cannot contact his clients in anyway shape or form through the internet. How does he get new clients or keep the ones he has? Of course the employer has not caught up with how social media can help their business and they are using antiquated reasoning trying to handle their own brand. And yet, I guess it is in their own right to try and do so.


Now, here is the slag. When I left my last salon three years ago, they referred all my clients; as well as gave them the option to stay at their salon with a “new client” special. And many clients did stay at Joseph Michael’s Salon & Spa as it is wonderful salon environment. In which case, the clients got to choose, and they are where they are comfortable. When I left “Blank” (over reasons plus more being said here) to go back to the new-location new-salon, Joseph Michael’s Salon & Spa, the clients were not given any idea where I had gone to. They were just told that their stylist would contact them. Is it in the rights of this salon owner to issue such an order to his desk staff; to not tell clients where their stylist went to? Maybe. And maybe that is my problem and every other stylist’s potential problem for as long as I’ve been a stylist.


But how many clients think that this sucks for them? How many clients has this happened to? If I had hair (and I don’t), I think location would be key, along with the environment of where I got my hair cut. If my stylist left to a place where I didn’t want to travel to, I think I’d just like to stay where I was. I would have seen the other stylist work and I could pick out my next stylist. And that has to be okay. Okay for the stylist, the salon, and especially me, the client who doesn't give a "Hootsuite" about how my own hair looks. But if the salon tried to keep me there by not giving me a choice, I would have not stayed at that salon. Location or comfort would be put aside. I would have a bad taste in my mouth and I would just go somewhere else - closer.


I believe those days are over. There is social media. A client can reach out and find their stylist in Blogs. E-mail. Twitter. Facebook. Yelp. CitySearch. And more.
And what about the stylist? What happens when a stylist blogs and Tweets and uses Facebook for his work and passions and yet gets the ‘let-go’ from his financial anchor? I don’t know about the rest of you, stylists. But I blog.

___________________________________________________________________

-----Original Message-----From a client @ dot.com to MafiaHairdresser @ dot.com

Sent: Wed, May 12, 2010 9:23 am

Subject: Where are you!!!!!


Hi JD,
I just called to make a haircut appointment with you and found out that you are no longer at "Blank!" I hope everything is OK with you! Have you gone somewhere else? The receptionist had the nerve to ask if I wanted to see someone else!!! I said I've been with JD for like 16 years!! I would love to hear what is going on. Please email me back when you can. And also - I'm hoping that you are somewhere else - I need a haircut!!!
"Client"


I’m a hairdresser. I’m also an environmental enthusiast who tries to spread the word of good Earth stewardship and I’m a writer who has written two as of yet to be published novels. I’ve had a column in an Orange County newspaper and I’ve sold one screenplay and had a hit play. And every one of these endeavors or occupations has relied on the other to be able to sustain the other. Listening to clients gives me ideas and a pulse on the world for my stories. The money I make from doing hair pays for events that I might produce like an Earth Hour party to raise funds for a group like Climate Cycle or put me through programs like Chicago’s C-3 which teaches community leaders everything green in the city to know. I’m a good community leader because I care and I’m a feisty writer and a damn fine working hairdresser. And you are invited to subscribe to this blog or Tweet about what I say, share it on Facebook or "Yelp" on any other social network with your own opinion about what I say in your own words.

Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!
http://mafiahairdresser.com/

Social Media and the Death of the RSVP

How do you feel when you invite someone to an event, via Evite, FaceBook events or by DM or "feed" on Twitter, and then the person does not respond?

Quite unintentionally, I did a little experiment in this realm only to realize that people do like me but are overwhelmed by social media.

I was throwing an Earth Hour fundraiser to benefit Climate Cycle, a Chicago bike ride that puts solar power in Chicago schools. So, like any social "media experts," I tweeted regularly, to alert the media. I emailed the PSA's to the proper media. And I changed my FaceBook picture to the national Earth Hour logo and sent out a detailed Event invite to FaceBook friends whom I specifically wanted to attend this $10 lights-out with-flashlights event at an art gallery. Also sent were 4o Evites via email to my nearest and dearest as well as 300 emails which probably overlapped all of the above.

Do you know how many RSVP's I got the first week? Two.

Of course, I thought I had booked my event on the same night as a bigger better event in Chicago. Or maybe the cost was too high? Maybe my friends hated me? Or worse: my social media "influence" was so low that anything I did was not going to be important enough to attend or mention.

Upon investigation, the media people could only put me on a calendar because there were so many other Earth Hour events going on in the city of Chicago. Yeah for green Chicago! So my feeling were not hurt there. And when I began to message my friends on FaceBook who did not respond, most of them said they had been busy and didn't even notice the event or that they were waiting to respond to see if they could come.

Of the emailed and Evited, I began to make personal calls. And that is when my event booked up. Of all of my verbal RSVP's on the phone, all of them said they felt overwhelmed by Emails and Evites and Facebook events. And most everyone had just shut down, looked down, and pretended that hadn't seen any invites or posts from anyone. Not just mine. They were just overloaded and most all of them appreciated my personal call.

Now, I'm not saying that I'm going to call everyone the next time I have another event or party. But I think I'm going to look at snail-mail and phoning to, at least, the most important friends that I want to come to my next party.

It's sad that social media is overloading people so much that they are not responding at all.

I get it. Many of those invitations are directs sells to something. And we are all victims of being one of many people using social media for personal use-which also makes us targets, publicly exposed to marketers and other social media experts, like me, who have something that we want you to buy or attend.

If I have any advice at all on this subject, it is to respond. Yeah or nay. On Facebook and Evite, feel free to decline. Your invitor needs a head count. I like to add that the "event sounds great but that I have previous engagement." No feelings will get hurt, and you will keep getting invited--maybe to an event that you would like and can attend. On Twitter, go ahead and retweet or DM your twit-friend and say "what a cool event"-you can also say that you would go but you cannot. To me, Twitter is still a personal conversation with many and we do need each other. Maybe not now, but we are all building up "followings."

To all those who don't respond: Don't worry about it. If the person who invited you wanted you to come so bad, they could have sent a real (old fashioned) invite in the mail or (gasp) called you.

My last comment is an apology to all those whom I had not responded to in the past. I promise to let you know if I can or cannot attend your event. Your event is important to you and I respect that you would like me to throw you some love. I can do that, if not in person, then in a two sentence response.

Sincerely,

Jon-David

Don't forget to supscribe to this blog and order Mafia Hairdresser, the novel at MafiaHairdresser.com on sale 1-1-11