Death Club

I’m a writer and sometimes I do not get to choose the topic or subject that I end up writing about. Most artists/writers/painters/hairdressers, often say that their work is actually just channeled from a spirit or passion outside or within themselves. Today, my passionate spirit tells me that I am going to write about death.
Damn. I’ve been the “lucky” conduit of sentences and thoughts relating to this subject before. When one of my best of friends, Dennis, died in a car accident five years ago, I wrote a whole fictionalized tale about the incident. What was finally written (#catharsis) was a story about the guilt and loss one feels when loosing someone close who was so young. Because of my loss and with this story I realized my membership into the Death Club. The Death Club is the club that you think you can be a part of but never really are until you loose a close friend or family member. You may know what to say when someone else dies--someone not close to you. You may know how to do the right things, like listen to, comfort, or cook for the people “left behind.” But you will still be the same person you were, and will continue to be until you officially become a member of the Death Club.
When someone dies young or untimely or brutally, it changes the people close to them. For my own loss already mentioned, it got me to thinking that I should have been nicer to Dennis. Listened more. Cherished our relationship more. Before his accident, he had broken his leg, and gained weight and felt lethargic and unhappy. I was his buddy but I kept up my pace, go-go-go, of which he had previously been a part of and no longer could or wanted to. On the night of the accident, we were talking back and forth while he was driving from San Francisco to Palm Springs. I knew he was tired and I knew he probably had a glass of wine with dinner. And I knew he sounded bummed out but both of us always tried to stay “upbeat;” meaning: we hardly talked about what was really up with us. It was only minutes after I talked to him that he swerved into the guardrail and was instantly killed. (No one else was hurt.)
I have not been the same person every since that accident. I hear Dennis in my head telling me to keep writing. Dennis was always my biggest cheerleader and he always wanted me to write about him and our adventures—and I have and I do hope one day to publish those stories. Nowadays, I may be a little bit of a “go-go-guy,” but I don’t distract myself with the silly things that used to jeopardize my goals. And I always try to listen to the writing that is trying to channel through me. I would not be as good or diligent a writer without Dennis, nor without the Death Club.
What brought this subject to mind on this day? #1 Last February, my fourteen year old niece became a member of the Death Club. He beloved friend, Aly, and Aly’s mother were murdered by a mentally unstable ex-spouse.
#2 My friend Mark was murdered in his own Arizona apartment in a few nights ago.
Both of these deaths have linked me to my niece and Mark’s friends and family. I know what they are going through. And I know what the days ahead are going to be like.
Yes, I know what to say to the one’s left behind. And they know I will be here for them. But, more importantly, I know that they will never be the same person they were before their friends were taken. It’s a terrible club to be a part of, but one that we may all have to unwillingly join one day. We have to make what we make with this membership. I write.
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

The Savings is lost on me. But Save yourself.

I am declaring, right here and now, that I will probably never join your rewards program. I will not sign up to receive your discounts. And I cannot fathom even thinking about clicking on anything to get the coupon deal, even if it could save me 50% or more on my next meal at my favorite restaurant or store.
The other day when I was doing my friend and client Kim's hair, she told me to go to Groupon.com and get the $100 for $50 "daily special" for one of my Chicago restaurants, Elate. Well, I have always recommended Groupon to my clients and I love the restaurant at Hotel Felix, Elate. So I told all my other clients about it the rest of the day. I'm just one of those guys/hairdressers that likes to, not only run your life by telling you how you should look, but I like to help you in your day-to-day life as well. This is probably a damaged-ego thing, but I feel it's in the "helpful symbiotic" category and it makes both me and my clients happy.

Anyway, on my way home from "helping" people at work, I stopped at a CVS to get a packet of adult bed wetting pads and noticed that there were two prices on the shelf-marker. One for CVS members and one for non-members. Then I remembered why I did not like to shop at CVS. I had to carry yet another membership card, sign up with my email address so they could hound me, or worse, send me paper shit at home.

The whole reason I was getting the damned wet-the-bed pads was because my room-mate and I have little dogs and we know that the adult pads are cheaper than buying the actual dog wee-wee pads. [See, there I go again, passing on useful information. I can't stop! You're welcome.] But at CVS they have to rub it in my face that I will LOOSE money if I don't join their stupid club or rewards program; of which I will forget to activate online, or I'll forget the actual activated membership card at home when I go to purchase my next packet of adult bed wetting pads. It's not enough that anyone in line thinks I'm incontinent. I have to feel like I'm stupid for forgetting the coupon or card. Or I have to feel like I'm loosing money and maybe I'm just too lazy to save it.

From now on, F-U: Ace Rewards and Best Buy and DSW. Screw-you to every restaurant that gives me those tree-wasting hole punch cards. And ptew-ptew on you Groupon.com and firstgiveing.com. I'm done with you and your complicated savings. I'm paying full price and I will have more time and less money and I'm gonna live my life, god-damn-it!
But I will totally recommend you to all my friends and clients. There are some very good deals out there. Ya'll should know about them.

Soooo, after I got home from Walgreen's with my dogs' cheaper wee-wee pads, I sat down at my computer and wrote what I'm sure was a pleasant blog about hair, or something about how to be green or about cute furry animals. Something helpful. By the time I went to bed I, of course, forgot to go to Groupon.com. I missed the daily deal.

The next day when Kim called me to go to Elate for dinner, there was a surge of hate and bile that riled up in me. I was very angry. At first, I felt it all for Kim for telling me about the deal, of which I lost out on, and then the rage turned upon myself for WASTING money. And then, suddenly, I felt a calm, like I have never known. I found my inner peace. And then I said to Kim, "I'm free tonight. You're buying."



Groupon.com Firstgiving.com HotelFelixChicago.com You really should try them all.

And you should also subscribe to my blog or go to MafiaHairdresser.com. I will probably not reciprocate if it's too hard or if I have to remember a special code or carry a card.
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

Mad Hatter's Tea

Mad Hatter's Tea:
1 part 7up
1 part White Cranberry Juice
1 part White Wine
1 part Apple Pucker
1/2 part Blue Curaso
2 parts Absolut Vodka
Mix all together and Chill for 1 to 2 hours and serve shaken in martini shaker with ice: straight-up in martini glasses.
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

Social Media and the Death of the RSVP

How do you feel when you invite someone to an event, via Evite, FaceBook events or by DM or "feed" on Twitter, and then the person does not respond?

Quite unintentionally, I did a little experiment in this realm only to realize that people do like me but are overwhelmed by social media.

I was throwing an Earth Hour fundraiser to benefit Climate Cycle, a Chicago bike ride that puts solar power in Chicago schools. So, like any social "media experts," I tweeted regularly, to alert the media. I emailed the PSA's to the proper media. And I changed my FaceBook picture to the national Earth Hour logo and sent out a detailed Event invite to FaceBook friends whom I specifically wanted to attend this $10 lights-out with-flashlights event at an art gallery. Also sent were 4o Evites via email to my nearest and dearest as well as 300 emails which probably overlapped all of the above.

Do you know how many RSVP's I got the first week? Two.

Of course, I thought I had booked my event on the same night as a bigger better event in Chicago. Or maybe the cost was too high? Maybe my friends hated me? Or worse: my social media "influence" was so low that anything I did was not going to be important enough to attend or mention.

Upon investigation, the media people could only put me on a calendar because there were so many other Earth Hour events going on in the city of Chicago. Yeah for green Chicago! So my feeling were not hurt there. And when I began to message my friends on FaceBook who did not respond, most of them said they had been busy and didn't even notice the event or that they were waiting to respond to see if they could come.

Of the emailed and Evited, I began to make personal calls. And that is when my event booked up. Of all of my verbal RSVP's on the phone, all of them said they felt overwhelmed by Emails and Evites and Facebook events. And most everyone had just shut down, looked down, and pretended that hadn't seen any invites or posts from anyone. Not just mine. They were just overloaded and most all of them appreciated my personal call.

Now, I'm not saying that I'm going to call everyone the next time I have another event or party. But I think I'm going to look at snail-mail and phoning to, at least, the most important friends that I want to come to my next party.

It's sad that social media is overloading people so much that they are not responding at all.

I get it. Many of those invitations are directs sells to something. And we are all victims of being one of many people using social media for personal use-which also makes us targets, publicly exposed to marketers and other social media experts, like me, who have something that we want you to buy or attend.

If I have any advice at all on this subject, it is to respond. Yeah or nay. On Facebook and Evite, feel free to decline. Your invitor needs a head count. I like to add that the "event sounds great but that I have previous engagement." No feelings will get hurt, and you will keep getting invited--maybe to an event that you would like and can attend. On Twitter, go ahead and retweet or DM your twit-friend and say "what a cool event"-you can also say that you would go but you cannot. To me, Twitter is still a personal conversation with many and we do need each other. Maybe not now, but we are all building up "followings."

To all those who don't respond: Don't worry about it. If the person who invited you wanted you to come so bad, they could have sent a real (old fashioned) invite in the mail or (gasp) called you.

My last comment is an apology to all those whom I had not responded to in the past. I promise to let you know if I can or cannot attend your event. Your event is important to you and I respect that you would like me to throw you some love. I can do that, if not in person, then in a two sentence response.

Sincerely,

Jon-David

Don't forget to supscribe to this blog and order Mafia Hairdresser, the novel at MafiaHairdresser.com on sale 1-1-11

Pet Psychic

Okay, here's a neat one: An animal communicator who has helped a client and her pets.

My client Barbara is a church going gal who was previously not too keen on metaphysics. But when she and her two cats moved in with her new husband and his hound, Elvis; Elvis began to howl every night and he began to shed profusely as well as chew his own cheek. Being a compassionate woman, Barbara instinctually knew that that the dog was having adjustment problems to the new additions to the household.
She and her husband took the dog to the vet which resulted in giving Elvis "doggy-Valium." Her husband also changed the dog's diet and took the dog on longer walks. All to no avail. Elvis still howled, shed and chewed.
So, on they sly (not telling her husband), Barbara decided to call and scheduled an over-the-phone session with a pet psychic: Someone who had also worked wonders with a neighbor's pet. Barbara said, when they psychic answered and got on the line with her, her two cats and the nervous dog came running into the kitchen, where she was on the phone, and the three all sat down and stared at Barbara on the phone.
Weird-kewl, right?
The psychic then preceded to tell Barbara that the dog was freaked out because the husband had been paying more attention to his new bride and had not been paying as much attention to the Elvis. (Which seems normal for a new marriage-if you know what I mean--but devastating to the man's prior best friend.) The Psychic also stated that Elvis had noticed that his master also let the cats up on the furniture which was something that he had never been allowed to do. The dog also"told" the psychic that he feared that his owner liked Barbara and the cats more than him, and that he was waiting for the day that the husband was going to get rid of him.
Poor Elvis!
The advice to Barbara from the psychic was to just notice how the dog looked every time she was at home sitting on the couch with her husband. Were the cats allowed on the couch? Did she and her husband acknowledge the dog? Also, because of the dog's shedding and his nervous tics, the psychic bet that the husband did indeed resent the behavior of his older pooch and truly had been tending to ignore him--which Barbara admitted that he did and was.
After the session, Barbara changed the way she was around the dog and also "led" her husband to pay attention to the dog without telling him her behavior was a direct result of calling a pet psychic--which she never told him anyway.
Long story short: Dog is happy. No howling. Stopped shedding. No more Doggy Valium; but they kept the good new diet for the dog. Husband and Elvis are happy and best friends again.
I've recommended this woman to many of my clients. She's good at what she does. Use her if you have a problem to solve with your pet, or if you think your pet is depressed or needs help that you cannot figure out.
Here's the Animal Communicator's current information:Carol Shultz, Animal Communicator
P.O. Box 577
Pekin, IL 61555

Carol@carolschultz.com
http://www.carolschultz.com/index.htm

As of 8/31/2010, I have not used Carol's services. Today, I emailed her with payment: My dog Junebug (Yorkie) has taken to peeing on my roomate's dog's eating area (Tina the pug) and I cannot get her to stop. I'll let you know how it goes.



I'd also like to mention that Carol is mentioned on the wall on FaceBook Animal Ministry page. She helps animal and owner rights in Illinois. Join her cause and the Animal Ministry.
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

Dark Circles/Puffy Eyes & Irritated Acne Skin

Dark Circles and puffy eyes are due to a build up of toxins under the thin skin around and under the eyes. Some peeps suffer from this build-up more than others. But your diet and sleep should be looked at if you, all of a sudden, get circles and puffy.
Here's a good remedy:mix equal parts [1 tablespoon/1 tablespoon] of filtered or bottled water with plain old corn starch-- then slather a little layer of the white paste mixture under your eyes. The corn starch will naturally pull out the toxins and quiet & sooth the area around the eyes. Leave it on 5 to 20 minutes every morning or right before you go out. This is very safe for your eyes. When you rinse off the now-dry paste, your eye cream and make up will go on smoother and your eyes will be refreshed and clear.

You can use this mask on your entire face too. Great for all types. ESPECIALLY ACNE Skins! Normal/Dry Oily. It calms the skin and lets the impurities loosen up.

For extra dry skins you can mix low-fat milk instead of water. But never use the low-fat milk mixture around the eyes. Only the pure water formula. For skin that is extra oily: you can mix carrot juice with the corn starch. But never use this formula around the eyes either! Only the pure water formula.

Yeah well, you're welcome.
Love ya,
Mafia Hairdresser.
" Best hairdresser in Chicago "
Thank you to you and Yelp and City Search
Please order your copy of Mafia Hairdresser, the novel about my life as a hairdresser to a mob couple in the 80's, and subscribe to this blog!

Green Cleaners

These are my two favorite recipes for green cleaners that I use regularly at home. They are the first two recipes that I learned how to make when I became a C-3 leader* in Chicago and I have taught friends and classes of people how to make them.

Oh: Why would you want to make you own home cleaners?

Because cleaning products make up the bulk of our indoor air pollution. Even when they are dry or have dried, carpet deodorizers, window cleaners, tub and toilet scrubbers and disinfectants, and more, can interact with your nervous system, aggravate or activate asthma, irritate skin, eyes, nose, throat, lungs. Vapors and gases emitted from these products constantly release carcinogens into the air and may cause pulmonary edema, and inhibit reflexes. It doesn’t matter if these products cause only temporary headaches or dizziness, or short-lived skin irritation, or if you experience a fleeting slight narrowing of blood vessels or an momentary increase in blood pressure; UNLESS you know that cancer is has gone from 1 in 8000 to 1 in 2 people and Cancer is caused by irritation. Cancer is caused by irritation of an organ or a whole body system. Different cleaners irritate different organs and systems in the body.
Agh. We’ve made the connection. Enough said.
(Mafia Hairdresser will always get to the point quickly, unless I’m writing my “fictionistas.”)

Basic Cleaner:
½ teaspoon baking soda (or 2 teaspoon of 2o Mule Team Borax)
½ teaspoon liquid soap/cleaner (**this is the one I use the most)
2 cups hot water
Mix ingredient to together in a spray bottle and you can clean floors, countertops, kitchens and bathrooms and you will have no headaches, nasal or throat inflammations and your home will begin to smell cleaner and fresher. Add two drops of Tea Tree Oil for extra disinfecting. (I get my Tea Tree Oil at The Aveda Store on Michigan Ave. Tea Tree Oil is a natural disinfectant and there are other bacteria-busting essential oils that you can customize your cleaners with.)


Basic Window Cleaner:
½ teaspoon liquid soap/cleaner **
¼ cup white distilled vinegar
2 cups of water
Mix all ingredients in a spray bottle and go. I like this on stainless too.
I had a room-mate who did not like the smell of the white vinegar (although the smell wouldn’t hurt him like a VOC laden product) so I switched to apple vinegar. That one was good, and once it dried, he couldn’t smell anything at all--and that is the point.




**Mrs. Meyers Clean Day http://tinyurl.com/yfdut67
Seventh Generation http://tinyurl.com/2p7up
www.Ecos.com

Try making your own cleaner. Or try buying the environmentally-safe and health-conscious alternatives to your toxic unhealthy old products.


Here are some links to more in-depth articles if you so desire to read on. You can always come back here once you start breathing easier.

This is from Care2.com, Healthy & Green Living: http://tinyurl.com/yodpym It has more recipes for oven cleaners and carpet cleaners and more. I love Care2.com

A wonderful article about VOC’s and Asthma: http://tinyurl.com/mlfr49
NaturalHomeMagazine.com

Did you know that some of the very grass roots looking websites are funded and operated by big corporations that make new healthier and environmentally friendly products? Go to green-clean websites and keep clicking. Companies like Johnson & Johnson know that you are interested enough to want to make your own green products which means that they know that you will be abandoning their old products.
Most makers of products that currently have VOCs and carcinogens are now making healthier and less environmentally toxic products. They are gearing up for their “regular consumers” demanding to have VOC’s and bad elements taken out of their old products. They just aren’t ready to stop making their old products because most people are not quite up to speed on why we all need to buy healthy and be more careful as to what we pour down the drain. I’m ok with that, right now; so long as I know and you know and we spread the good word.
Two more helpful cleaners:
Hydrogen Peroxide: Typically found in the medicine cabinet, this disinfectant can also be used as an effective bleach alternative in the laundry room. Because it’s also a powerful oxidizing agent, it works especially well on food, soil, plant, blood and other organic stains. Just make sure to spot test in a discreet area because, like bleach, hydrogen peroxide may lighten fabrics. For each average-size load of whites, add 8 ounces of 3 percent hydrogen peroxide after you have filled the washer with hot water.
Salt: Perfect for cleaning grungy ovens, this natural abrasive is also great for soaking up fresh carpet stains such as red wine, coffee or ink. Pour salt on the wet stain. Let dry, then vacuum.

* http://tinyurl.com/ygrbkk6 c-3 Chicago Conservation Corps I'm a graduate and you can be too!


Don't forget to supscribe to this blog and order Mafia Hairdresser, the novel at MafiaHairdresser.com on sale 1-1-11